Why Do Kegels?
What is your pleasure worth? If there were one simple way to have stronger, longer, even multiple orgasms, one way to increase sexual sensation for yourself and your partner, what would you invest? How about a few minutes a day? That’s all it takes to reap the blessings of kegel exercises, or, as practitioners of Tantric sex call it, mulabanda.
Toning the PC (pubococcyx) muscle offers an amazing range of perks for women, but they’re not the only ones who can take advantage of kegels. Men who strengthen their BC (bulbocavernous) muscle can heighten their ability to become multi-orgasmic, learning to control ejaculation and separate the sensations of orgasm from ejaculation, a technique you can read about in an article that will be posted soon here.
For both men and women, doing kegels while self-pleasuring or during partner sex can create a brain connection that makes just the exercise alone a sexually stimulating activity—and one that can be done anywhere or at any time! Who wouldn’t enjoy standing in line at the ATM or the grocery store a little more if you were feeling and building their sexual energy and vitality while you wait?
How Do You Do Kegels?
First, you–male or female–have to find your PC muscle. Fortunately, it’s not difficult to locate: it’s the same muscle that you contract to stop the flow of urine. Try it the next time you’re in the bathroom. You’ll find that it feels like squeezing the anus but it’s more specifically squeezing your sex organ. As you women begin to practice, you may find that you can contract different sections of your yoni, or sacred space, the Tantric terms for the whole vulva area.
I first started practicing by reminding myself to do kegels every time I was stopped at a stoplight or stop sign so I’d have the red visual cue to remind me. I quickly realized how that no one could know what I was doing. I started doing them every time I thought about sex. As a sex educator, I think, write, and talk about sex all day long. I have very toned muscles!
It’s also possible to do a PC or BC muscle-specific workout. Some teachers recommend working out the muscle for 15 minutes –really hard– three times a week and resting it the rest of the time. I simply practice every time I think of it and have never noticed any problems with overusing the muscle.
Women who are working out might consider trying an onyx egg (available at www.lovenectar.com ) which has a string attached. To that string, attach a little bag of pebbles. Insert the egg in your yoni (pussy) and practice dropping and lifting it, varying between short contractions and extended ones. You may want to put a little lubricant on it. Any cold pressed oil (like coconut oil, which is solid and melts at body temperature is great!) or a silicone lubricant like Pjur Eros or Body Action Extreme Glide, will work well. This exercise becomes particularly important after child birth or menopause when simply squeezing without resistance may not build the muscles sufficiently to deal with stress incontinence.
I recommend doing short repetitions, about 10 in a row, contracting and releasing rapidly, and then a single long contraction while holding the breath before repeating the set. There are several variations of this exercise, each with different breathing practices designed to build energy or promote relaxation.
Men can perform kegels either while erect or flaccid. If you practice while erect, try putting a washcloth on your penis and lifting upward. Eventually, you may work up to wet towel lifts. This is a handy trick to master! During intercourse, you can use your cock to tap a woman’s G-spot. Contracting this muscle also helps to control or delay ejaculation more effectively.
Remember you can squeeze that muscle any time you think about it. No one will know but you. Keep at it, and you’ll be singing a new orgasmic tune in no time!